Changing Is Hard


I am sitting on my computer a few days out from New Year’s thinking about resolutions.  My family was home this weekend at my parents’  church.  My dad interviewed my husband and another member about the leadership training they went through with different programs with their jobs.  My husband, Charlie, went through many personality assessments, coaching sessions and group activities as part of his year long program.  He says “It is all about learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.”

He sat through feedback which had a lot of positivity.  However, he also had to face his weaknesses head on and make real plans to try and work on those weaknesses.  It has been really challenging for him to have to daily think about these things.  His coach told him at the end of his program “This is the hardest thing you will ever have to do in your career, but it will be the best thing you have ever done for your career.”

After church Sunday, we sat around talking about my dad’s lesson (which talked about practical ways we can change our lives spiritually) and Charlie’s interview.  My dad said the thing that hit him listening to Charlie and Trey talk about their leadership programs is that real and lasting change is hard.  It takes self-awareness and daily dedication to your goals.  It means being humble enough to admit your weaknesses and that you need help.

I am a sucker for resolutions!  I love growing and self help (although I am not always the best at carrying it out).  That is the problem.  How do you practically improve and not just talk about it?  I want to make some firm goals for 2016 before it sneaks up on me.  Instead of just making goals this year, I want to make some practical plans for making them happen.


Lindsey mentioned that we are both starting to read The Happiness Project (the link leads to the book on Amazon) by Gretchen Rubin.  A title like that would usually not be appealing to me.  It sounds cheesy and new agey (I know that’s not a word).  I saw Gretchen Rubin in an interview recently while flipping through channels.  What stood out to me is that she talked about how little effort we make to practically change habits.  We do not associate our habits with our happiness.  We just say “I want to be more happy”, yet sometimes not making our bed in the morning is contributing to our lack of peace.  She decided to focus on something different for each month of the year and have practical things to do to meet those goals.  For instance, she decided she wanted to be a more laid back parent one month, so one of her practices that month was singing in the morning.

I have just started it, and I can say that it is making me think about the things I want to work on this year.  I want to make some practical steps to get there.  So, if you want to join me and Lindsey, buy the book and share with us some of your goals!  This will be an ongoing thing throughout the year for us.  Also, look this week for some of our practical ideas about how we plan to get healthier (physically and mentally) and save money.  We said that this blog is a way for us to dream together.  Well, the posts this week are exactly a fruit of those conversations.  We hope you enjoy.  You don’t have to take our advice.  We are definitely not experts.  However, we hope it helps you think about what changes you want to make in 2016!

~ Laura


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